—Geronta, the girl who said to you that she is considering Monasticism told me that a boy from class asked why she won’t go out to the movies or out on dates with boys. What should she have answered?
—She should have said: “Not even my brother has ever asked me such questions, and now you are?”
—A few days later the boy found her outside of school—she hadn’t seen him—and he went to take her arm. She only said “hello” and immediately went inside.
—No, that’s not good! In such a position she should have reacted, because as things went, she may have given him the impression that she is fine with this show of affection and now he’ll do it again. The age she’s at now is a little difficult and its not good for her to keep company with boys. It is not even necessary for her to speak with them, unless perhaps they need help. If she decides to get married, when she meets a nice guy, she should tell her parents about it. They will evaluate whether the right prerequisites for starting a good family are there. For now, as she still hasn’t decided which life she will follow, speaking with boys won’t help; she’ll just get dizzy for nothing and loose her peace. Those kids who do such things are extremely miserable souls, flighty and constantly troubled; they have no peace. Their face and eyes are wild.
The attraction of the female gender to the male—and vice versa—exists in the nature of man. But, you should tell her that it’s not the time for that now; to attend to her studies. Kids who nurture this attraction from a young age, spin like tops before the right time. Later, when the appropriate hour does come, the top is already spinning and they aren’t able to be happy because they’ve already lived that happiness. On the other hand, those kids who are careful, rejoice all the more when the proper time comes, and until that time they have great serenity. You know those mothers who have lived purely, how peaceful they are, even though they’ve got heaps of worries?
I always stress that, a young person before marriage, should strive to live as spiritually as possible and to keep their purity intact. This ensures double health. Spiritual life is the basic prerequisite for whichever life one may follow. The world has become a field of wheat which, once the ears of grain sprouted forth, has entirely been trampled by pigs. Now all we see are weeds, mud and wheat thrown upside-down and, every once in awhile, off to the side, a lone, upright stalk.
The more spiritual work one puts into his or her adolescent the easier it be later on, whichever life is chosen. The better one loads and prepares before the battle, the easier will it be in the midst of the war, when bullets are flying and bombs are landing all around. Until the time comes to decide, for example, if a girl will become a nun or a good mother, a pure life is essential. That’s why, she must strive as much as she is able, to progress in her studies. When she guards her eyes and ears and rejects bad thoughts, she won’t have far to go later.
When he meets a good girl, a young man should strive to have good thoughts; to see her as the living image of a Saint. However, if he meets a girl who is a bit off track, to see her as a sister and be sorry for her, just as he’d be sorry to see his own sister fall, for we are all children of Adam.
—But today, Geronta, in the colleges, etc. there are many temptations for a young person.
—You must get connected with other spiritual people, so as to be helped and move about in a spiritual atmosphere. Let’s not make things more difficult than they already are. I know a lot of kids who are in college and live in purity, by their own small effort and the great help of God.
